I was listening to a TED talk the other morning called Simply Happy from February 14, 2014. Basically they discussed what makes people happy today and how every seems to be searching to be happier. One of the speakers said how we are a society of "now now now" and we work fast and hard for a quicker reward which we think will lead to us being happier. The people in the panel came to the conclusion that if we simply slow down we will enjoy life more and ultimately be happier.
The ideas of "now now now" and slowing down got me thinking. My mom is a very experienced woman. Being a licensed mental health professional, an all around awesome mom and laid back person she once told me just because someone writes you an email, text message or calls does not mean you have to respond right away. She is right, just because the email or text that is coming in right now is urgent to someone else does not mean it is urgent for me. But we are in this cycle of as soon as you get an email we have to respond so our inbox is clear. Taking this suggestion I have slowed down with technology. While I am still on my phone much of the time, I am trying to be as resourceful and productive for myself that I can be (yes, playing Words with Friends and Candy Crush help with my productivity).
As for the idea of slowing down, I feel like living in China our life has slowed a bit. For no particular reason, work is the same, the kids are the same, perhaps living in a foreign country is enough to slow anyone down, even with 24 million people in the city. Day to day I don't have this sense of urgency to get everything done right away. I actually have time to workout and take my time and not rush home to turn around and rush to school pick up. I have more time to read, watch Netflix, face time AND to be with my kids AND be relaxed about it.
My brother 3G was telling us a story this summer how he was talking with a friend in shul on shabbat and the friend had kids in middle school and high school. My brother was commenting how it's nice to be with the kids on shabbat afternoon but sometimes it's long and there is no time to rest or nap. The friend said to my brother how he wished he had that time on shabbat afternoon with his kids now his kids are older and out playing at friends houses and never home. It's like "future 3G" was talking to 3G to remind him to enjoy this time now.
In the TED talk someone tells a story about how he had young kids and they woke up every morning at 6am He and his wife were taking turns with the early morning wake up but getting tired still. The husband said he decided to change his perspective of the early morning situation. He started taking the kids out to the local coffee shop at 6am and coming back at 7am. He found after 2 weeks of changing his routine and his mental space for the early mornings he was in a better mood and enjoyed the early mornings with his kids rather than dreading it. He said that there will be a time when his kids will sleep till 10am or 11am and not want to spend time with him so he wanted to appreciate the time now.
This made me happy. If you slow down and really think about how you spend your time you may even enjoy it more. Hearing these ideas have made me appreciate the slowed down time here in Shanghai. It has allowed me to really enjoy the time with my kids more and find the time to do something for me and worry less about else I should be doing or even could be doing here. We live in this society where we constantly have to be doing something or going and if we are not than we are not productive.
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