We aren't the new kids anymore. It was bound to happen. I'm excited because it means new people to meet.
I spied them at school drop off. The boy was extra clingy to his father. I thought to myself how familiar I am with that! And how our drop offs aren't like that so much anymore. Most days are easy transitions, some days harder than others but we have adapted, as anticipated and expected. It was only a matter of time.
I smiled at the father and introduced myself, told him how we just moved here 2 months ago, and it will get easier.
As I type this I can't help but relay this to a feeling I had about 7 years ago. My father passed away suddenly and I before the funeral I was walking around thinking "how is the world still moving, people going to work, the movies etc and my world has stopped, come on people!"
In the weeks that followed my mom kept reminding the sadness will change, it will feel different. She reminded me of story from when she was saying Kaddish for her sister. Going to synagogue every evening, changing your life, for 11 months to mourn, learning a new normal. My mom said when a new family started coming to synagogue because someone had just died in their family she able saw for the first time how far her feelings and mind have moved from the initial loss. It gave her perspective how our feelings of grief change and evolve.
I felt similarly with my my experience with my father. The feelings, the intensity, the gapping hole. It's all still here but squeezes a different way into my life, how I incorporate my father in our life, by naming our first child after him, the stories we share, and traits (good and bad) that I have from him.
It is cliche, yes, time helps heal and life goes on. It's certainly something...to getting less hard!
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